SEARCH FOR MY
DESTINY
My name is Rhoda
Nyundo Zulu. I am an ambitious, dynamic and progressive woman. I am aware that
great people we admire are ordinary people just like you and me; only that they
have a special drive, determination and desire (Developing the Leaders around You by John Maxwell). According to
the Oxford Advanced Learners’ Dictionary, University Press 2002, to succeed is
to achieve what you’ve been trying to get or to be victorious. Hence I am on a pilgrim’s journey, towards my own
uniqueness. So if you think that you are done with failure, then this essay is
tailor made to inspire you.
When my mum was
expecting me, my father was hoping for a boy, so though I was born a female, he
still named me Harvey (meaning warrior), but I was christened Rhoda. One day I
asked him why he called me Harvey,
“Our culture values a boy such that he is
given charge of a family clan. This is one reason why although I grew up as an
orphan in various families I still went further with school. Now I am a father but I soak my legs in a pail of water to remain
awake and study. But your mother was denied further education by her own father
who opted for her brother, yet the brother failed. I will give you all my
energy so you can excel though you are a girl.”
I appreciated
his determination as I wondered what was special about males. When I started standard
one my teacher was female, Mrs Gomile. When I fell sick I was fascinated by a female
nurse who treated me. In view of the nurse I admired nurses’ uniform,
especially the white head cap. By and by these role models inspired me to work
hard. In 1975 I was selected to Likuni Girls Secondary School. I was surprised
by my father’s reward,
“Learn to drive this Raleigh bicycle. I
await to see you drive a vehicle one day as I do.”
While at Likuni
Girls there were several career talks by women that were educated and were
employed. Aim High Never Tire was the
school slogan of encouragement. Regrettably
back home relationship with my father turned sour after I only passed
Malawi School Certificate of Education Exams. By not making it to university I
failed to envisage any light beyond my failure. I was a shame even to our teachers
since nobody was selected from our class. My father called me loud,
“Harvey! Why did you fail? Your
headmistress Sister Perpetua Zitande assured me you were university material.”
I looked down
and left. “Why has Aim High, Never Tire
failed to prove my success?”
All along I put
maximum effort on my studies to please my father. May be I was complacent after
mock exams listed me on top ten. I wiped out my tears and clenched my hands,
“This failure is
not permanent,” I consoled myself.
One day a friend
of mine, Jane from Ntcheu visited us. She too just like me, had only passed
without getting selected to university. She sought permission from my parents that
I should accompany her to Lilongwe. But I got surprised when she led me to her
boyfriend; then her boyfriend brought me his friend to get married to. I refused;
a situation which led to being booted out of their home. Then luck struck when my
boyfriend Christopher Zulu from Ntcheu, who then worked at Malawi Housing
Corporation in Blantyre, came to Lilongwe. He took me to Blantyre. When I wrote
a letter updating my father about my whereabouts he instructed me to send back
the chitenje (wrap around) that my
mum had given me. As I wrapped and sent back the wrap around failed to figure
out how else I would regain my father’s favour. My apology carried no weight-
it only widen the gap between me and my father. Few months later we got blessed with our first
born daughter, Bertha in 1980 followed by a son, Patrick in 1982.
My ambition to
be employed set me to apply and did interviews at Malawi Broadcasting
Corporation, Malawi revenue Authority (MRA) then secured a job at Lever
Brothers. It was a blessing in disguise when my husband left Blantyre upon
securing employment with a construction company. I resigned to follow him
although I hated that I became a housewife again. Few months later I applied
and went to St Anne’s’ Midwifery School in Nkhotakota. Little did I know that my husband silently applied
for me to undergo training as a teacher which I had earlier refused. I complied;
quit nursing and went to Lilongwe Teachers’ College. That same year I received
a letter of success to start work at Malawi Broadcasting Corporation as an
announcer. This was based on interviews done two previous years. I was in a hurry,
decided to dump my husband’s choice; but my husband put me in a fix,
“If you don’t want to be a teacher, come
back to take care of the family.’’
I shed tears at
the lost opportunity. Upon graduating as a teacher we arranged to formalize our
marriage in Dedza. My father commended was pleased to hear I became a teacher.
Hence I taught Standard two then later requested to teach the next higher class,
every year. After I taught standard eight I requested teaching authorities to post
me to a correspondence Secondary School. It worked and smiled as I commenced teaching
at St Kizito Distance Education Centre. That same year I applied, succeeded and
underwent a Diploma study at Domasi Teachers’ College in Zomba. Back home one
day a neighbor, a woman whispered to me,
“These women laugh at you. They claim your
husband now does your female roles. One day he will remarry.”
Even my mother In-
law lamented,
“Why leave my son and these children?”
I did not answer
back, but I was unstoppable. My husband advised me to ignore them. However, I encouraged
one woman; she accepted, went back to a night secondary school and passed. She
too went to a teacher college. Unfortunately her husband died just after she
completed her course. After the funeral the gossipers envied her that she would
ably take care of her family singlehandedly. Upon graduation I was posted to teach
at Chichiri Secondary School. Hence for four years I taught Form 1 then 2 then
3 and 4. While I wondered what my next line of achievement would be, in 1999 I heard
a radio advert for producers and presenters at Malawi Broadcasting Corporation (MBC).
I immediately forwarded application, interviewed and got employed. One of my
brainchild programmes was ‘Mai Wamakono’
(A woman of today). I got inspired by break throughs that some outstanding
women had made. Among notable women interviewed were former president of Malawi
Mrs Joyce Banda who by then chaired National Association of Business Women in
Malawi (NABW) and Mrs Anastazia Msosa who was then a high court judge.
In 2001 MBC
management trained me in development journalism then seconded to the
Development Broadcasting Unit of MBC. Our Kenyan manager sponsored me in
driving and the first car I drove for three years was a land rover. I visited my
father with the land rover; we found him drinking chibuku (local beer made from fermented maize). I felt pride and
joy as he crowned me,
“Now you are the pillar of our family.”
In 2003 I got a
scholarship through the Joint OXFAM Programme in Malawi; hence I did undergo post
graduate certificate in Non Governmental Organisations’ Management with
Imperial College, University of London. I passed with a credit. I was very glad
that long at last I had regained closeness to my parents. In 2005 I applied and
got a scholarship from National Media Institute, went to the Rhodes University
in South Africa to study Media Leadership and Management with the Sol Plaatje
Media Institute. My face was awash with smiles on this long awaited first
flight, the fantastic scenery of Tambo International Airport, Johannesburg town
then to Graham’s town where Rhodes University is. One day I met an old European
woman past the university library. She had a walking stick to support her
balance. We greeted and she told me her pride as she was doing her Masters in
education after she retired long time ago. I informed her that I failed to make
it to university. She looked at me held my hand and said,
“Look at me. I just
turned 60 years. I will not die before I attain my first degree. Go back to
school.”
I recalled I was
48 years old while I crowned this woman. I thought this woman was my angel. I
promised to take next action.
With my husband
we bought a plot at Machinjiri Area 12; after which purchased four more plots.
We now have planted over fifty fruit trees. This was yet a long time dream realised.
Our house at plot 1 of our five plots
Another
milestone was that I applied and studied Community Development at the Malawi Polytechnic.
I passed with higher credit. Come 2008 I applied, succeeded interviews then
joined Story Workshop Educational Trust (SWET), a local media Organisation. Next
I applied to a private university which by then was accredited by the Malawi
Government-Blantyre International University. I continued studying community
development; such that I then joined a class level which our fourth born
daughter Caroline Zulu was. I did distant learning while I continued doing
community work. (See pictures below).
Rhoda (centre) captured during community nutrition
displays
Above:
Rhoda, from a radio producer to community development facilitator
As we chatted my
husband commended that teaching career had developed me. I thanked him. Unfortunately
he passed on in 2013 before I graduated in 2014. I marveled as Professor Charles
Chamthunya encouraged me,
“Congratulations, always aim high.”
I smiled while
inwardly recalling, “Aim high never tire.”
My continued search for career
advancement resurfaced when in 2017 I applied, selected and started Masters of
Health and Behavior Change Communication at the Malawi Polytechnic University. Out
of 38 students who started, we are only 16 remaining. The rest gave up because it
is tough going but am determined to score.
Let me point out
that I discovered my writing potential upon being tasked to write community
stories for projects’ visibility. One of my feature articles I wrote was “Kanthu nkhama motomoto’ (hard work
pays). Mr Sambalikagwa Mvona, then an editor of the magazine) from Moni (greetings) magazine who had
selected this article invited me to join the Malawi writers’ Union.
Since then am
always close to my pen and paper. One of my writings is Flight to Success, an insipirational article, published in the
Bachelor of Chikanda, an anthology of the Malawi Writers’ Union. Through continued
personal efforts I have undergone international training by FEMRITE Uganda Women Writers, an
all Women
Writers’ Workshop in Kampala, Uganda, in 2011. While there I interacted and contributed to an African Women Writers’ Anthology, Summoning the Rains, in 2012; with my short story, Knife Pleat Skirt. The story was derived from a gender based
violence incident which is believed to have occurred in Malawian community. I
was further privileged when I got a scholarship to join active female writers
from some African countries at Rockefeller Foundation, Bellagio Centre in
Milan, Italy. There we setup the African
Women Writers Network.
Finally, bear with me that not all
goals will be achieved; not every dream will come true. But you must keep on in
motion while you stay focused. Surmount any discomfort on your life journey for
I have never seen a storm last forever. Don’t
ever give up. Rise up soon after every fall because your best stories will come
from your struggles. I am unique because I always turn my failures into seeds
for my next achievement.
Rhoda Zulu steps up the ladders at the Bellargio Flat, Milan Italy, 2014
I love Malawi, my sweet home
Sharing joys of
female contributors to anthology, The
Grafted Tree
